30 mental health tips from a black therapist
I saw a tweet from @pigletish on Twitter asking about things that helped your mental health and I wanted to give my answer.
Everyone doesn’t have access to therapy but more people have access to the internet. So I’m bringing Mental Health resources to the internet because everyone deserves access to quality care.
These are the things that helped my mental health the most:
1. EMDR Therapy with a competent, patient, and caring therapist.
2. Taking my meds as prescribed!!
No, I didn’t get better all of a sudden. I got better because I was taking my meds consistently and they were in my system long enough to work.
3. Proper sleep hygiene.
Going to bed at the same time nightly.
8+ hours of sleep.
Relaxing/spa music before bed.
Warm showers with 5 seconds of cold water (then back to warm).
Wedge pillow for comfort.
Headband headphones to listen to positive affirmations while sleeping to rewire my brain to think more positively.
4. Accepted my disabilities and starting finding and creating accommodations/resources:
Created a free community for Black women to connect, heal, and thrive.
Reduced the amount of work I do (after considering my budget).
Taking vitamins to be proactive about depression and anxiety (Vitamin D & Ashwagandha. I am not a doctor and this is not medical advice.).
Cleaned different areas of my home during ads on YouTube or while listening to a podcast so it doesn’t feel like I’m missing something.
Sitting down to rest when needed.
Meal prepping when I have the energy to cook.
Keeping precooked meals in the freezer for times when leftovers run out and I’m still not feeling well.
Actually wearing my CPAP mask to bed.
Using a pill organizer with photos of the sun and moon so I don’t mix up my meds.
5. Regular check-ups with my doctor for peace of mind.
6. Splashing cold water on my face when I’m feeling very fidgety. It resets the nervous system.
7. Dancing to twerk music to release stress from my body. Trauma can be stored in the hips and waist.
8. Morning walks for sunshine & grounding purposes.
9. Learning how to set AND implement boundaries with myself and others.
10. Journaling in my notes app.
11. Recording myself talking on voice memos so I can listen to it and pretending it’s a friend. This helps me gauge if I’m being delusional or it just doesn’t sound right. My gut will tell me everything.
12. Reaching out for help from loved ones!!!
13. Learning to not feel like a burden for asking.
14. Deconstructing the religion I grew up in, which helped reduce the need to be perfect and a shining example of what a woman should be. Or what a person has to do to stay out of hell (the ultimate punishment).
15. Exploring what I actually like instead of other people’s hobbies because I wanted them to always know I supported them.
16. Being vulnerable with others so they know:
How gentle I am.
Why I like things a certain way.
Why I’m easily startled.
Why it’s difficult for me to believe someone would actually come through for me and not have to say “if you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself” afterwards.
That I’m very protective of people I’m close to.
17. Allowing people to love me just as I am.
18. Realizing that family, community, and joy is way more satisfying than having a lot of money.
19. Acknowledging that it’s literally not my job to help every single person that says they need help even if I want to.
20. Realizing that overextending myself can lead to burnout and resentment for myself and others. And that resting isn’t the only thing that helps me get through this. I actually have to dig deep and figure out why I took care of everyone except myself… as if I wasn’t worthy of the same love and care that I give others (even strangers sometimes.)
21. Giving myself grace on things that I regret doing.
22. Opening myself up to romantic love and all of the vulnerability that comes with it.
23. Trying over and over again because I’m really passionate about certain things.
24. Learning to actually stop trying before I hurt myself emotionally. Think of it like exercising too much and getting an injury at the gym.
25. Stopped thinking that everyone is my friend and that they move the same way I do.
26. Noticing that there are some extremely trustworthy people and it is worth it to keep those relationships strong.
27. Talking about my emotions with my loved ones after asking if they have the capacity for it.
28. Talking to myself aloud when I’m unable to talk to my loved ones.
29. Self soothing by telling myself it’s going to be okay. Over and over.
30. Making a playlist of TikTok/YouTube videos with positive affirmations on them to play in the background (for my subconscious brain to keep hearing and rewire).
If you read this far I’m proud of you for taking the steps to work on yourself! And if this helped you at all, please help me spread awareness by sharing this blog with others.
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